Thieving cab man

I have been coming here for days on end and my head is still blank,i know not what to write! Ki lo de? E ma gba mi ke? I just read other blogs,have a good laugh and make comments. It is so so dry! Me i tire o.

Meanwhile, i have atarted losing some weight o,i thank God and y'all who gave me tips.

Hear my story... some crazy Cab man stole my purse on Monday. I didn't believe someone could be that fast and he tricked me,i felt so stupid but then how could i have known? I entered the cab,we moved a little and the guy asks me if i had change,i said i had 200(was supposed to pay him 150) so he said i should bring it so he would get some ticket thing(some people just give tickets to cab guys for 50 box,don't know what's about). Anyways,he collected the 200 and says he ain't going again saying VIO(some pips that catch cabs not painted Abuja cab colour 'green and white') is on the road so he gives me back my 200 and asks me to get off and take another cab. I tried to get down but the door won't open so he reaches across to help me open the door(i was sitting in front and my bag was on my laps). I just put my purse back in the bag and the bag was open. Of course i was distracted trying to open the door cos he told me to hit it in a certain way and i was getting pissed as the door refused to bulge and was even shouting at him to get down and open it from outside but the guy no gree o,he was even vexing that i didnt hit the door well,imagine!

Finally,the door opens and i just came down and banged it close,He said 'take am easy now.' My pips,na so i enter another cab o,paid him 150 from the 200 d guy gave back to me and got to where i was going,lo and behold my purse was gone with all my ATM cards,my i.d card and seven grand and i had only 50 naira left. I wan craze! Well,thanks to God,i had my Sweets to call,he picked me up and i started all the running around for police report,wetin police carry me do na another day story. Well,i got it,did my affidavit myself(as i be lawyer now) and then my day was just messed up. I began to invoke scriptures. I say Baba "i pay my tithes o,the devourer is rebuked for my sake" e.t.c

Amazingly,on my way to court on tuesday,someone calls me and says he found my purse on Bwari road which is like 40mins drive away from Abuja metropolis,i went to get it,all things were in it except the cash of course and then my mum and sweets passport were gone. The guy that found it sef had to be real cajoled by Sweets to collect some cash for his help. Yes! there are good people still in Naija. My faith came alive all over again in God and in Nigeria. I just forgave the thief,at least he gave me cash to get to where i was going. It was while i was gisting my friend,she told me that in all that hulabaloo of opening the door,while i turned to struggle with the door,the guy had removed my purse.Apparently,same exact scenario had happened to her before and her phone was stolen. O ga gan o!

Well,i thank God, i didn't have to do all the stress of getting my i.d and ATMs back.Moral?
Beware of cabs that have door issues,always pay your tithes. Trust me,it works.

On a lighter note, a woman got sick and while in the hospital,she died. Got to heaven and begs God,He sends her back saying she has like 30-40 years extra to live. The woman comes alive,gets well and goes to do all kinds of surgery you can think of,face lift,tummy tuck,boob job e.t.c giving herself a total make over. after the last surgery,as she walks out of the hospital,she was hit bya car and dies instantly.

She gets to heaven and says God,but you said i had 30-40 years,what happened? Why d'you let the car hit me? God says,oh sorry dear i didn't recognise you!

Have a great Holiday!